Updated: Mar 8, 2020
You have dreamed of this day, planned for this day, imagined this day. You want it to be perfect and you have planned every detail and moment to make sure the biggest day of your life is exactly what you imagine, that it is perfect.
But what is perfect? The truth is nothing, no matter how well choreographed ever goes according to plan. Flowers girls refuse to walk down the isle, groomsmen forget their shoes, cakes have accidents, the list goes on. The reality is something will happen, the trick is to roll with it and remember it is all fixable and at the end of the day no one will ever remember that one groomsmen had to borrow shoes from the photographer and they won't know that someone had to fix the cake topper at the last moment. They will remember how amazing the bride looked, her fathers speech, how good the food was and how much fun they had.
My wedding was on a December day thirty years ago and like every bride I had planned the perfect day. On the way to rehearsal we broke one of the alter pieces and had to send someone to the store. It snowed without warning the next morning and we were not aware that the annual toy run would be going by the church at the same time our guests would be trying to pull in and park. The ceremony had to be delayed because of both and some guests were nervous about the weather and icy roads and choose not go to the reception at the last minute. It has been thirty years and I honestly don't remember if other things went awry but I remember walking down the isle and marrying my best friend and I would do it again. That is perfection.
Twenty seven years later on a Saturday in August our oldest son walked down the isle, it is still fresh in my mind. In May of that year in the middle of turning our property into the reception venue a rare micro-burst tore thru Olympia and we took a direct hit, news crews flying over our home and all. We had to repair the damage and still put together a venue by August. We made it, it was done and it was beautiful. The week of the wedding we had almost record breaking heat and wildfires in Canada were causing thick smoke and air quality warnings. The weather cooled down just in time for the rehearsal dinner but the luxury restroom trailer that had been reserved for months & guaranteed to be delivered early Friday did not show up. We got up early the morning of the wedding and begged a local company to bring us three portable restrooms on a moments notice before 200 guests made it from the church to the reception. The groom then cut both index fingers and probably should have had stitches. My best friend and I played doctor and everyone made it to the church on time. Not wanting to feel left out the cake was in a car accident on the way to the venue and had to be fixed and we discovered there was a wedding three properties down, we both had wedding crashers we had to redirect. The guests never new about the bathrooms or that they were supposed to have a fancy trailer instead of port-o-potties and no one cared. No one noticed the cake had been repaired and everyone raved about the food and the dessert table. It was the best day ever and our guests danced until midnight. In the end the most important part and all that really mattered was Josh & Patty were married and they were happy. It was the perfect day.
In the midst of dreaming and planning your perfect day plan to be flexible. When your wedding day finally arrives focus on enjoying every moment, taking in the beauty of what this day means to you, your partner and your family. Let someone else handle the little things that will come up and roll with all of it because no bride should be in tears over the flowers not being perfect or the cake topper being crooked. Some things will go as planned, other will go haywire but never loose site of what and who truly matters because at the end of the day you are now husband and wife and that is truly all that matters It will be the perfect day.